How to Guard Your Heart
Lifeless things offer no satisfaction
My own struggle for acceptance within the Russian Church has always resulted in disappointment whenever I've allowed my heart to be owned by fellow clergy or bishops. My need for affirmation from others always distracts me from focusing on God. Ownership of my heart should be reserved for God alone. Evil spirits use whatever means they can to make me feel abandoned, discounted or unloved by anyone that I've allowed to own my heart.
Service to the Church does not protect a man from the demons of pride. I, like so many priests before me, have learned that I must guard my heart. We clergy can easily be distracted from our service to God if we allow ourselves to become envious of the recognition other priests get from the bishop. If a priest feels his work for the Church goes unnoticed by his bishop, his ministry can die on the spot. I've witnessed many a brother priest loose his enthusiasm for ministry when he's seen other, often much younger clergy, raised in rank while he's passed over. If we force ourselves to see God's will in this as a way of humbling us, we will ultimately gain that which is of eternal value, the Pearl of Great Price. Rank, awards and recognition are all nice, but not if they come at the price of having lost our soul.
Priests are in service to God so they are particularly susceptible to the attacks of demons, for the evil one wants to lessen the impact of our service to God's people by attacking our feelings of self worth. Like all people, if we clergy keep our focus on God, we don't need the love of our bishops or the respect of other clergy. God's love is sufficient, for only our relationship with God has lasting and eternal value.
Sometimes we have to pull ourselves back from others and enter into The Silence. This self imposed exile is the spiritual retreat that helps us focus on what we have in God.
With love in Christ,
Abbot Tryphon
Monday August 29, 2011 / August 16, 2011
12th Week after Pentecost. Tone two.
Afterfeast of the Dormition.Translation of the Image Not-Made-By-Hands of our Lord Jesus Christ from Edessa to Constantinople (944).
Martyr Diomedes the Physician of Tarsus in Cilicia (298).
33 Martyrs of Palestine.
New Hieromartyr Stephen priest (1918).
Father Bless
ReplyDeleteThank you for these very edifying words.Although I am not clergy, I have been serving in the altar at my church for 5 or 6 years, and for a while I had been struggling with this sinful state. This posting is just what I needed to read for encouragement to continue on my very slow path to a more hesychisic life even though I still live in the world.
In Christ
Serge King